May 8, 2015: Home

when you’re a kid, you think of home and you see
walls, with windows and curtains to hide in
you see wallpaper with tea parties and closets holding your greatest treasures
If you said you’re going home, this is where you’d go

and then you grow up
you leave the walls, and the smells of home cooking
you leave the floor that creaks in a certain place
you say goodbye to the door that opens up to the sky
You say goodbye to home

In your travels you sleep under different roofs,
as you find new hiding places and different smells,
friends become family and boys no longer have cooties,
but instead give you shelter under their loving arms

This new city shares its story with you and you share yours with it
New sheets become the fort under which you cry
New streets become the unknowns you can explore

And suddenly, going home isn’t quite so simple

Home is no longer the house in which you grew,
It is a friend’s hug
and a city’s noise
and that boy who looks at you that way?
well you’ve found home in his gaze

so if you say you’re going home,

where is it that you’d go?

March 30, 2013: Roots

Return
ed
back to a place I will never truly return
Memories of old friends and firsts, lasts..
beginnings.. ends
It’s changed but I stay here
Changing more than every day
I remain here
But I also can never return
Learning more and more
Nothing is ever for sure and our roots do not remain
They spread
and I dread the day when my roots grow no more
Oh sprinkle rain absentmindedly upon my dry skin
Let me drink it in
Not too much though..
I’ll start sinking in my own foundations

I’m already knee deep in imagination
As I dream to be a star in the eyes of another
to become a wonder to behold
The mold or creator of something I can hold
or something someone else can bounce off of
into the sky of their own passion

I want to meet other stories
and meld them with my own
I want to see other places and make them my home
Spread myself out upon this tangle of webs
and I dread the day when my roots grow no more
Lying dead on the shore of can’ts and won’ts

Float with me
Together we’ll see
Whatever it is
We need to see
Wherever it is
We need to be

But first, let me return..

December 17, 2012: Pizza Pie

Home

She swallows hard

 Stare out the window

Homes fly by, none hers

He is her home

Her family is home

Friends are her home

Rrrrrrrrrrrip

Is this a pizza pie

with multiple toppings

Or a game of monopoly

where chance and a roll of the die

Determine where you place your house.

She smiles as a four-legged friend

bounds forward

A grand hug for such innocent love

The childhood room has since been

redone.

Cold.

Retreating lazily back to the familiar

room of TV, couch and

Mom wraps her old fuzzy blanket around

Her tired shoulders

Love.

She smiles at her broken family

Missing her brother who long ago moved out

But content to be sandwiched in between

Mom. Dad.

One of the many places she feels at home.

August 7, 2012: Monkey Bar Travels

I wish I could reach the sky
Grasp the clouds with my fingers
And swing across the world
On the monkey bar clouds
The blisters would tell me how far I’ve come
How far I’ve gone
Oh, what fun it could be
With a hint of danger it becomes
Exhilarating.
A challenge.
To see dreams come true and possibilities revealed
To uncover the line between
What you can do
And what you will do
Can you push through the exhaustion?
Will you dare to swing higher than you ever thought you could?
Then you must also wonder
If you ride too far among the clouds
Does it become harder to go home.
As much as monkey bars smile you
The first touch of ground homes you
Nothing is better than
that first grain of dirt
Between
.
your
.
toe
.
s
After flying on air for so long.

Waking up from a long and refreshing nap.

And so she went away,
To a reality unknown to the rest
And there she stays
Asleep in the other world
But wide awake in the new, in the now

And so she left behind her skin
To make the travels lighter
Carrying only what she had within
Not knowing what she’d discover
But ready to take in the new, the now

And what she found could not be kept
What she kept was already found
All of this while she slept
In the world she’d left behind
Not sure how to carry the new, to remember the now

And so today she lives half-awake
Long after she had left
A bandaid for the splitting ache
Of living in two worlds
Breathing in the constant news, living in the nows

****************************

It’s hard. So many changes in your life. So quickly and so suddenly your mind must work overtime to take it all in.

I promised some travel themed posts when I returned from my trip, but somewhere between almost falling in love with someone I won’t see for years, moving into my first apartment, starting my first year in a teacher’s program, and rediscovering who I am, who I can be… I found myself distracted from my creative side.

Let me explain. I know you’re thinking, well, with all these new things to think about, wouldn’t it be a prime time to scribble poetry, love stories and inspiring thoughts? Apparently not. It may be just me, but writing seems to take a certain amount of focus, of dedication to the blank page in front of you. So many times after my journey I felt I needed to release my emotions, but though I tried (believe me, I tried!), it just seemed impossible to even begin. I found myself wandering to memories of summer romance, of the future, of who I have become. It’s only been just recently that I have woken up from that very stimulating dreaming state.

So here I am. Stretching my fingers. Yawning out a slightly long, rambling post to remind you all I was here. And here I am again. I have lived. And here I live again. I have loved. And here I love again.

My nap is over, and so you shall read again.

Enjoy 🙂